Duality in kindness

There's a saying that goes to the tune of "Never meet your heroes, you'll be disappointed". You may have seen or heard it as a line in a superhero movie, a quote in a book or maybe even an online post.

The quote probably holds different meanings to each of us (thank you, subjectivity). For me, I struggled with the word 'hero' at first because I found it hard to distinguish between a hero, mentor or idol. Some may define their hero as a famous people, like their favourite singer, adventurer, artist, explorer or actor. Others say their parents or best friends are their heroes.

After some deliberation, heroes in my eyes have to be people that I know personally. So that narrows it down to family and friends. There surely are some extraordinary ones and they have one thing in common -- they are genuinely kind people. I've had the chance to spend significant amounts of time with them and unfortunately, they saying at the start of this post does hold water.

The more time you spend with people, the higher the chance of finding out that they're not all about the rainbows and butterflies you had in your mind. The same way the outwardly happiest people are usually some of the saddest people you'll ever meet, the kindest people will unfortunately also be the most cruel ones you'll ever experience.

Of course there's the juxtaposition that will make each trait seem exceptionally extreme. I guess it's hard to reconcile how someone you hold to be so kind in your heart can act in any cruel way. So when it does happen, you don't see it coming. It's unexpected, it's shocking, you're in complete disbelief that the pedestal you'd built was actually made of cheese -- it melted with just a bit of heat. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is when you wish you'd never met your hero.

At the end of it all, I still hope you meet your heroes. In the grander scheme of things, you'll be better for it. Just remember to ground yourself in the fact that they too are human and possess duality, as do you. TLDR, nobody's perfect. We learn something from every interaction. It'll either be a lesson on how you want to be, or how you never want to be.